At first glance, that background is waaaaaaaaaaaaay too busy. I am shocked that you are at 1/250. There appears to be little to no separation between her and that vase. But that could also be because she may be sitting right next to it and the shot isn't all that tight. If nothing else, back up your camera as far as you can possibly go. Of course I am assuming you didn't already, but if you didn't, that would really add some separation.
I agree with redcoat. She is looking to far off-screen also. I don't necessarily think she needs to be facing the other direction. I'm not sure what that would accomplish. Why did your colleague suggest that?
It definitely needed some diffusion. Either that or move your light source farther away from your subject.
As for that second light, I'm going to say you used it for a backlight. If so, it looks just right - not too intense at all. Just a nice touch of light on the back of her hair. If anything, it might need to be pointed down just a bit more so it catches her shoulders. Then again, as I say that, I notice what kind of chair/couch she is sitting in. That could be your problem. I was taught to always try and find a chair that doesn't go above the subject's shoulders and sit them in it. Even if it means pulling some chairs out of the kitchen/dining or any other room in the house and set it somewhere, this will not only help give you more background to work with for depth of field, but it will allow you to get that nice rim effect on their shoulders with your backlight.