Please Critiques My Videos

Here's what I think:

Th Bike peice has some nice framing, nice use of the sun and backlighting. The Framing on the interview with them on the rock is really nice.
The video did not play very well on my computer, the frame rate was really low. A peice like this you too to see more action, more tight shots, more presentation. what they were doing didn't look difficult they way it was shot. YOu needed better natural sound, rubber on rock, the crank and crask of the bike.

The second peice I was board before the end of the first bite... Poor lighting, and a meandering sound bite just too me no place fast. Get to your b-roll earlier, the porch scene goes on forever.
 
Lonnie....Bike story....wow, what an improvement from when you first posted here. I think you're starting to get it...very nice composition on most of your shots...loved the sunset beauty ones....good nat gathering...but I think you still need to work on building the story. Some of the nats on the bike story seemed force....so try and find an appropriate place instead of just putting them in there....easier said than done right? But try stuff like...Hi, I'm Brad Smith...nat...and I ride trial bikes....nat....what's a trial bike....nat....its a specialized bike...nat...and so one. Its building an intro...finding, tweaking, fine-tuning..to building a great intro....keep at it because it takes practice. I don't know why it bothers me but the only thing I didn't like was using some of the sunset shots too early....maybe use them in a section grouped together or save it for a nice end...end of the day and end to their ride sort of correlation...but that was very well put together considering where you were with your first stories. Nice effort.
 
I don’t usually participate in these critiques sessions because I was told that I need to work on my diplomacy. I come from the old school where a swift kick in the a$$ is the quickest route to the brain; but I try to be nice.

I’m talking about the stunts piece; the old lady riding on the backseat of a bike isn’t a story. Here in Florida we have women in their 70s with wrinkled tattoos riding real Harleys, not even those with training wheels. Now, that’s a story.

The reason that I’m replying is because you’ve done a few things that I really like and you should build from there. Your photography is excellent; many of those shots would look good framed on the wall; excellent composition and good lighting. Are you by any chance a photographer moving into video? When I made my switch from still to film, (this was back in the late 70s) I had the very same problem; I was creating beautiful still photos on film but took me awhile to put them into good stories.

I also like that you used the main characters to carry the dialog, who would know better about the activity that they do. I really started hating those VJs or OMB that suddenly are becoming primadonna on camera, or those monotone narrations that sound like they are delivering a eulogy at a funeral.

To start you have a good established shot of the two subjects; but the public like to see faces to go with voices, after the wide establishing shot move in and give us closers shots of the two, there’s no need to stay wide. We have established where they are, I might want to show a bit more rocks, now let's see who they are.

The downside of this piece is that there are too many beautiful shots used as filler and with no direct connection to the dialog and as a consequence the story doesn’t flow well and has no continuity. There are too many wide shots followed by other wide shots and by more wide shots. A wide shot is to establish the next segment, or the story within the story; once you’ve done that move-in to a tighter shot and some CU, then repeat the process and start again for the next segment or use CU to break into long wide shots.

Looks like the sport requires a great deal of concentration that would call for some CU of the faces while executing those stunts, we haven’t seen any of those. Also looks like there’s a lot of balancing done with the handlebar, we haven’t seen many CU of those either.

There’s a fine art in asking questions, here I would have like to hear if this is an organized sport? They said that they part of a team and they are talking about event organizers, where are these events held?

Considering the easy accessibility of the sport a disclaiming warning would also be appropriate; I can see kids filling the beds of the local emergency room. Don’t forget that we are here to serve the public.

I could go on and on but overall I like the piece, mainly because of the photography, build from there.
 
Hi,

Thanks for the critiques. I really really appreciate it. About the BIKE video: I've been told many times not to go wide to wide. I try not to but sometimes I get tunnel vision when I shoot. I know I needed more tight shots but I missed some of the examples provided by Nino (thanks for taking the time). I included the disconnected shots as an attempt not to go wide to wide except for the shadow of the guys walking.

Yes, I am a still photographer. I came up in-between eras. While getting critiques, some guys liked to drill you a new a--hole and others were nicer, but it was so hard getting honest critiques that I didn't mind a kick in the ass.

Oscar, I'm working on my interviews. It's tough but I'm trying to get better. I interviewed them a few times to make sure I had a good variety to chose from. I was wondering about the timeline of including the later sunset shots earlier in the video. At my job, they told me it was fine.

I definitely want to improve my storytelling. I'm looking for a good workshop for 2010. If anybody has any suggestions, please let me know.

Thanks for the critiques.

SC
 
Late Response

Square Circle said:
Hi,

Thanks for the critiques. I really really appreciate it. About the BIKE video: I've been told many times not to go wide to wide. I try not to but sometimes I get tunnel vision when I shoot. I know I needed more tight shots but I missed some of the examples provided by Nino (thanks for taking the time). I included the disconnected shots as an attempt not to go wide to wide except for the shadow of the guys walking.

Yes, I am a still photographer. I came up in-between eras. While getting critiques, some guys liked to drill you a new a--hole and others were nicer, but it was so hard getting honest critiques that I didn't mind a kick in the ass.

Oscar, I'm working on my interviews. It's tough but I'm trying to get better. I interviewed them a few times to make sure I had a good variety to chose from. I was wondering about the timeline of including the later sunset shots earlier in the video. At my job, they told me it was fine.

I definitely want to improve my storytelling. I'm looking for a good workshop for 2010. If anybody has any suggestions, please let me know.

Thanks for the critiques.

SC
Click to expand...

It actually is okay to do...however, if there's a big disparity I would try and avoid it as much as possible for future reference. You can always cover bites so we don't actually have to know but its a style choice. To help out you can do what you did and interview them continually throughtout the shoot...but you can also ask the same question in various forms so you can get what you need at different daylight times as well. Looking much better though.
 
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