Just stumbled across it
- Thread starter Rad
- Start date
First, kudos for taking the initiative to shoot the story in the first place. It was certainly one worth telling.
The only visual element missing for me was a more clear establishing shot. I did wonder why most of the b-roll shots had that telescopic look.
My other thoughts had to do with the writing and structure of the story. I'll spare you those unless you wrote the story and would like feedback on that aspect of it too.
The only visual element missing for me was a more clear establishing shot. I did wonder why most of the b-roll shots had that telescopic look.
My other thoughts had to do with the writing and structure of the story. I'll spare you those unless you wrote the story and would like feedback on that aspect of it too.
Deft Depth
Active member
A couple of things:
Great story promise with a lot of compelling sound. Several great shots showing the decay of the cemetary, espeically the skull sticking out from the ground; very nice eye to find that and use it effectively.
Constructively speaking I felt like there were far too many dissolves. That's more of a personal preference I have than a slant at the way you edited the piece; it still looked nice.
I also though you could have framed up the woman in the purple shirt better to incorporate the rule of thirds better. I noticed there were those crosses in the background. You could have moved her to the far right of the screen and left the crosses filling in the remaining space in the background. Add a little depth of field and it would have made for a great interview shot. It would have also been nice to see more interaction from the people in the story with the graves themselves. I envision them standing over the broken-down graves, clearing them of debris, even just looking at them contemplatively.
Overall, I think I would have liked the story more had you not used the special lens. What was your motivation for using it? Personally I was distracted by it and found myself looking off to the sides of the screen and not the image itself.
Great story promise with a lot of compelling sound. Several great shots showing the decay of the cemetary, espeically the skull sticking out from the ground; very nice eye to find that and use it effectively.
Constructively speaking I felt like there were far too many dissolves. That's more of a personal preference I have than a slant at the way you edited the piece; it still looked nice.
I also though you could have framed up the woman in the purple shirt better to incorporate the rule of thirds better. I noticed there were those crosses in the background. You could have moved her to the far right of the screen and left the crosses filling in the remaining space in the background. Add a little depth of field and it would have made for a great interview shot. It would have also been nice to see more interaction from the people in the story with the graves themselves. I envision them standing over the broken-down graves, clearing them of debris, even just looking at them contemplatively.
Overall, I think I would have liked the story more had you not used the special lens. What was your motivation for using it? Personally I was distracted by it and found myself looking off to the sides of the screen and not the image itself.
NEWSSHOOTER3
Well-known member
Cool
First off, again, nice job just "grabbing" the story on your own! That's so hard to do in the heat of the day, but this turned out nice!
Just a few notes:
* Nice "parallel parking" job! I always get a kick out of that!
* I also think something else was needed to establish the opening. I know I'm slow, but I didn't really know what I was looking at, at first.
* The subject placement was a bit funky on the black lady, in front of the white crosses. I know what you were going for, but it kinda looked like she had crosses on her head?
* Also, (of personal interest) maybe a little more background would be cool, Rad. Were all those people just randomly out there as you drove by? Did you turn this the same day?
All-in-all, I really enjoyed this piece. Its certainly something that I would dig shooting... no pun intended!
First off, again, nice job just "grabbing" the story on your own! That's so hard to do in the heat of the day, but this turned out nice!
Just a few notes:
* Nice "parallel parking" job! I always get a kick out of that!
* I also think something else was needed to establish the opening. I know I'm slow, but I didn't really know what I was looking at, at first.
* The subject placement was a bit funky on the black lady, in front of the white crosses. I know what you were going for, but it kinda looked like she had crosses on her head?
* Also, (of personal interest) maybe a little more background would be cool, Rad. Were all those people just randomly out there as you drove by? Did you turn this the same day?
All-in-all, I really enjoyed this piece. Its certainly something that I would dig shooting... no pun intended!
A Step Above Productions
Well-known member
Overall nice piece and I have to agree with most of the coments so far...
lady in purple - did not like the framing
Disolves - too many
Wide angle lens - took away from the story
Opening shot - I liked it but you should have keept it up longer.
Was this a one day shoot or did you go back the next day for the interviews?
lady in purple - did not like the framing
Disolves - too many
Wide angle lens - took away from the story
Opening shot - I liked it but you should have keept it up longer.
Was this a one day shoot or did you go back the next day for the interviews?
jim sitton
PRO user
I like your shooting style. (Fishing not Fighting, Corolla Horses, all of them.)
Your HD Demo story is one of my faves. Nice moment when you puul back that screen, "yeah." workin Photog on cam. I love it!
To use your own words, You're a pretty decent photographer
Jim
Your HD Demo story is one of my faves. Nice moment when you puul back that screen, "yeah." workin Photog on cam. I love it!
To use your own words, You're a pretty decent photographer
Jim
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Rad
Well-known member
Than you all for the feedback. Far too often I get sort of full of myself and I appreciate being brought back down to earth... in a friendly, professional, thought-provoking kind of way.
I shot the area the mayor (white guy) and first black woman were sitting, without them in the shot, figuring I would dissolve them in "ghost-like", but when I could move the other woman, and when I tried it in the edit room, it ust didn't work.
Belhaven is about 2-1/2 hours away, I figured I had the one shot at shooting this on the way back from the coast. As you can tell by the sun, I was fighting the clock while shooting.
I agree... I sort of started and it was hard to stop. I think it also slowed the pace.
The lens on my camera in not very wide... using this ill fitting wide-eye greatly increase the width of view. It looks pretty good when down-converted to 4x3, so it's a compromise, overwhelmingly not a favorite among this group!
Both of the women were mobility challenged, the one in purple was chair-bound, and right up beside her car. I sort of did what I could without making her feel uncomfortable.
I shot the area the mayor (white guy) and first black woman were sitting, without them in the shot, figuring I would dissolve them in "ghost-like", but when I could move the other woman, and when I tried it in the edit room, it ust didn't work.
I shot this the evening of July 3rd, Belhaven is known for it's July 4th celebration and getting someone to meet me there was difficult. I got the people I could get there, for better or worse.
Belhaven is about 2-1/2 hours away, I figured I had the one shot at shooting this on the way back from the coast. As you can tell by the sun, I was fighting the clock while shooting.
I think I'll print this out and put it on the outside of the tape cassette.
I shot this on the way back from the coast, after driving and shooting all day on other stories. One day shoot, in fact shot in just two hours, racing the sun as it was going down. I wrote and edited the thing a few days later.
The wiggles
I missed the first half when it aired, so it was nice to see it from the beginning.
My nits to pick...a few wiggly shots towards the end. They stand out because everything else is so solid. The wireless transmitter really stands out against the white shirt. The folks at home may not notice or care, but that's what we get paid for. I thought it was a nice piece. Can I blow it out of the server now???
I missed the first half when it aired, so it was nice to see it from the beginning.
My nits to pick...a few wiggly shots towards the end. They stand out because everything else is so solid. The wireless transmitter really stands out against the white shirt. The folks at home may not notice or care, but that's what we get paid for. I thought it was a nice piece. Can I blow it out of the server now???
NEWSSHOOTER3
Well-known member
Celly
On a side note, I was in the middle of Alpharetta, Ga today, in the middle of a new "white collar" park. I just happened to notice an OLD cemetery out of the corner of my eye, in the middle of a small thicket, so I jumped out. I often wonder why a street is named... whatever its named. Well, this overgrown cemetery was populated with Morris's... the street was Morris St. I'd love to talk to a living Morris and know the story... because of Rad's piece...
I thought that was dude's celly on his hip. Didn't even notice.
On a side note, I was in the middle of Alpharetta, Ga today, in the middle of a new "white collar" park. I just happened to notice an OLD cemetery out of the corner of my eye, in the middle of a small thicket, so I jumped out. I often wonder why a street is named... whatever its named. Well, this overgrown cemetery was populated with Morris's... the street was Morris St. I'd love to talk to a living Morris and know the story... because of Rad's piece...