I might as well stick my nose in on this part of the forum as well.....
This is an excellent story. Very well shot, and probably even more so, very well edited. Great use of sound. Not one missing element. And as I always say, you can't shoot it tight enough. You shot it tight and nailed it. XCUs are what people remember the most unless you have some totally dramatic action.
OK, so here's the but..... it all jumps off the screen until the formal interview with the doc. The lack of good lighting there seems like a stumble in an otherwise perfect run. If your lighting can rise to the level of your shooting, you will be a steamroller. I know lighting in local markets takes a back seat most of the time for the obvious reasons. So it becomes even more important for someone to make a name for themselves by learning to do it better than anyone in town. They might match you shot for shot, but you learn to be clever with the lights, you'll shoot right past them (pun intended).
Keep up the good work. You'll always have a job.