Project Linus Nat Package

[MaskedRider83]

Greetings!

Long-time lurker, and good friends with one of the top posters here...

Here's a 3-minute Nat Package I did for a group of volunteers who make quilts for sick children. Since there was no distribution, I did what I could to expand on the characters... Have at it!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9xL3U4CiJjA&feature=channel_video_title

Thanks!

MR83

 

[BryantVW]

I wasn't a big fan of the opening shot. It wasn't interesting and didn't show me much of anything except the outside of some building. And it lasted a bit too long. Good inside nats though... would have been good if you showed us small parts of the sewing machines to go along with it... The thread being pulled from the spool, hands working, a closeup of a face. Just enough for us to SEE but not really know what is fully happening yet.

There were a lot of opportunities for great sequences to be happening and I feel like you didn't take advantage of those. An interview shot went to a medium shot of a woman cutting, and then a closeup of someone else sewing. Repetitive actions like sewing or cutting are GREAT for match action sequences. I would have liked it better if you gave me a 3-4 shot sequence of the lady cutting fabric, or the woman hand sewing.

You use the nats of the machine going up and down a lot to break up your sots. That's fine, but it gets repetitive. I don't believe that was the only good nat sound happening at the time... put a mic on the table and try to hear the scissors, or mic someone up and just get them bantering. It's a bunch of old ladies in a room, I'm sure they're gossiping and chatting and laughing. Use those sounds to break up your sound bytes as well.

I'm confused about some of the dissolves. You use them in some places where they're not appropriate (showing the polka dotted blanket). That may be so it doesn't look so jump-cutty. If the only way you can get out of that jump cut look is to do that... I would suggest not showing the blanket up close more than maybe once. We see it in the interview, that's enough for me.

Whoa, that little girl is holding the mic in her hand? Thats kind of distracting to me. Was that like the only way she felt comfortable talking?

A lot of creative shots, good clean sound, and I like how you varied up the interview shots. It is a well shot piece. Good job

 

[Latin Lens]

Here's what I loved about this piece...you are making and made huge strides in how you are thinking about getting a natpkg done. You're working outside your comfort zone and you are understanding some concepts and trying to apply them to your story. With that said...as you give this type of effort and thought...you will get better. You are on the ground floor so the obvious direction is up. The opening shot was weak and kinda long...but I see what you are going for...had you "jazzed" it up with a sot underneath...little better...maybe used a sign at the entrance to library...little better...just try and get the best intro to draw me in...sometimes you can use sound to help supplement. Nats sounded good so you were in great position to get sound but yes by the middle it got repeatitive and so did the shots...I am sure there were more variations you could have gotten so it didn't get so visually repeatitve...and why only the sewing machine...aren't there other noises involved when making blankets...measuring cloth, cutting, etc....use those too and this is where interaction amongst the group comes into play...to get natsots..."Hand me those sicossors"..."Oh Helen help me cut this"..."This cloth is gonna make someone warm"...those kinds of natsots that really give flavor to the piece. I liked the variation on your intvs...different locations, different looks and composition...don't be afraid to let them keep working and ask them questions while they are doing something so it doesn't seem so "traditional"...so while a lady is sewing buttons...ask her what's she doing...be more fluid...thats where your personality helps because you make them feel comfortable around you and the camera close to their personal space...there's a big differance and once you master it you'll take your nat sots to a whole new level. Little girl was cute but it was rather distracting seeing her hold the mic...not much you can do unless you want to cut her out entirely...but there's bigger fish to fry here. Interaction would have helped more...hearing the ladies talk amongst themselves...started to lose steam near the end...I had to watch the crayon part twice because I clearly didn't understand the transition at first view. I probably would have saved the lady who got a blanket to the end for more effect...was there no meeting and hugging and laughing or crying or thanking...would have liked to have seen that. You've been studying and it shows. It will take time to master these techniques but like I started off saying...huge strides in the right direction!! I applaud the effort but it still needs work to give the piece a more natural look and feel. Good effort.